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Ten Places in Great Britain You Might Not Want to Move to

by Mike Crowl on 09/08/07 at 7:52 am

We can’t help where we’re born, but we can certainly avoid moving to a place with a strange name, and since the United Kingdom is full of strangely-named villages, you should look before you leap.

  1. Muck, in the Inner Hebrides

    We’re cheating on this one a bit, as Muck derives from the Gaelic name Eilean nam Muc. It’s so small that if you moved there you’d barely push the population up over thirty people. Appropriately, it’s one of the Small Isles, and is only 2.5 miles from one side of the island to the other. One earlier owner of the place tried to persuade the famous Samuel Johnson that it was actually called the Isle of Monk – but failed.

  2. Maggots End, in Essex

    In the Hertsfordshire.com listing of villages in the county, there’s no entry for this place. However, we know there’s a farm there, as anyone taking a walk from Manuden to Furneux Pelham needs to turn right at Maggot’s End farm. Maybe the maggots have finished the place off.

  3. Pratt’s Bottom, in Kent

    Of course, any place with Bottom in the title is likely to get a laugh, even though bottom may mean nothing more amusing than a valley. Back in 1773 this place was known as Spratt’s Bottom, but less than 20 years later it had lost the initial S, and Mr Spratt had turned into a Pratt.

  4. Nether Wallop, in Hampshire

    Before your imagination starts to boggle, consider this: fields in Nether Wallop are identified, by one Dr. Guest, with the Gualoppum of Nennius, one of the last battlefields of Vortigern the warlord with the Saxons. And Danebury hill is crowned with an ancient camp. So even though we may scoff at the name, it has history.

  5. Nasty, in Hertfordshire

    This is definitely a place that causes difficulty. From one ad on the Net we have this line: Nasty Jobs, a local guide to recruitment agencies and vacancies Another talks about Nasty web sites and information.

  6. Thong, in Kent

    To say, ‘I live in Thong,’ might easily be misconstrued, especially by someone who’s a little hard of hearing. Even worse, some people live in Netherthong, up in West Yorkshire. Now that’s really stretching it!

  7. Mid Yell, in the Shetland Isles

    Again, telling someone you’re in Mid Yell might make them look strangely at you. What is a mid yell, anyway? And how do you define it? Nevertheless, Mid Yell is thriving, with a school, two fish processing plants, medical services, shops and the smallest petrol station you’re likely to see.

  8. Rest and Be Thankful, in Strathclyde

    This is the highest point on the A83 between the northern end of Loch Fyne and Loch Long. It’s obviously a bit windy up there as in 2002 a lorry was blown off the road. Maybe not so restful after all.

  9. Dykehead, in Strathclyde

    This ambiguously-named town seems always to be hear of in conjunction with a place called Shotts. The Shotts and Dykehead Pipe Band is one of the best known features of the area. In fact, the Band has won the World Pipe Band Championships no less than fifteen times.

  10. North Piddle, in Worcestershire

    What can we say about this, except that another Piddling place, Wyre Piddle, has a brewery which produces ales with names such as Piddle in the Hole, Piddle in the Wind, Piddle in the Dark and Piddle in the Snow.

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5 Comments

Pseudonym

Aug 11th, 2007

Near Thong there is also Bean and Womenswold.

This amused my lesbian friend greatly.

Mike Crowl

Aug 14th, 2007

The list I’ve given is incomplete in terms of absurd English names: I was just starting with ten to keep from going overboard!

clockerz

Mar 13th, 2008

Bean is nowhere near Thong. Bean’s on the outskirts of Dartford!

Jeanette

May 2nd, 2008

I am a Mid Yellian and it’s a cool place to live!

Mike Crowl

May 4th, 2008

Mid Yellian? Where’s that?

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