Trifter

When I first arrived in Japan I spoke very little Japanese. I started taking lessons but by the time a friend and I decided to do a day trip out to the big city, Osaka, my Japanese skills had not substantially improved. We took the local train from where we lived in Okayama, a smallish city, and reached Osaka 3 hours later. At the end of a day of shopping and exploring we jumped on another local train heading back and assumed that even though we had left Osaka very late in the evening we would arrive safely at home.

The train hit its last stop about an hour from our destination. All trains had stopped, as it was late at night. My friend began to panic and because she had no Japanese skills at all, begged me to solve this problem. So I approached the stationmaster and used one of my newly acquired words in a sentence that roughly translated to, “I go Okayama.” He understood though, and said a lot that I couldn’t follow, but with hand gestures clearly implied that it was not possible from here. But then he said the word for bullet train, a word that I had just recently discovered. With another clever sentence made by combining “bullet train” and “Okayama“ I ascertained that we could take one of the last bullet trains back home.

The final word I used was part of a phrase to ask, “how much?” We paid for the tickets, got on the bullet train, and arrived back in Okayama with enough time for my friend to make her final connection.

I was a hero. With just three words and a lot of body movement I had solved the problem. During the train ride back my friend kept thanking me, saying that had she been on her own she would have been stranded. That’s actually not true. She may have had even fewer words at her disposal but her communication skills were strong so she would have crossed the language barrier (with hand gestures, tone, stick figures, etc.) and arrived at the same end result.

I on the other hand, was not a great communicator back then. But my time overseas in a land where I do not speak the national language well has helped turn me into one. I am now someone who has a lot more patience with others, can sense what people want and are feeling just by reading subtle body movements, tone, and word choice, and can get my point across in a clear and approachable manner.

Visiting Canada after 1 year abroad, everyone commented on how my speech patterns had changed and that I spoke much more carefully than before, to ensure that I would be understood by everyone. I had more patience at shops and restaurants when dealing with problems and individuals who probably shouldn’t be in the service industry. I was amazed at how I was able to interpret the pauses and subconscious meanings behind sentences when talking to friends and acquaintances. I was also surprised at a lack of subtlety on the part of others and it was obvious that they were saying far more than they were intending.

Back in Japan I developed these skills even further as I began to get more involved with management. After all this time talking to students using a variety of different methods to get my meaning across, and staying relaxed when this took time, I found I was able to do the same with colleagues. I could choose the right words to pass on bad news in a softer way, and I was conscious of body language on my and on my staff’s part and used it to keep the conversation and our relationships in a positive direction.

I was also able to get a lot out of my staff because I could read them so well. I knew what they were interested in doing and what they were capable of not just based on what they said, but how they said it and by their actions. I became more observant and aware.

My time in the classroom and in a country with individuals who do not speak my language has made me a strong communicator. I am now a good listener, can use my heightened awareness of what others are thinking to adjust a conversation to get the results I want, and I have the patience to try different approaches. Of all the skills I’ve obtained since my time in Japan, the ability to communicate well has clearly been the most valuable. And whenever it gets difficult, I just remember the patience that stationmaster showed me when I only had three words at my disposal.