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Top Seven Reasons You Shouldn’t Move to Florida

by Nancybugx6 on 18/07/11 at 10:46 pm

A well-wishing list to convince sane people not to move to Florida.

I live in Florida, a state that we locals often call “The Penis of the US,” and plenty of other even more colorful names. I moved here in October 2002 from lovely little Connecticut and have wanted to leave since. I have admittedly met some good people here, that keep me here for now, but plan to high-tail it out as soon as I graduate college. Everyone knows that Florida is a great tourist destination with nice hotels, lots of amusement parks and hot weather. I won’t argue that it’s a nice place to visit, but I feel like I need to educate unsuspecting people on why they wouldn’t want to live here.

1. The water stinks

The tap water here, although of a drinkable quality, (in most areas) stinks. It literally smells bad. It’s because of the high concentration of chlorine used in the public water supply to purify it. It also tastes less than refreshing and crisp. In fact, it tastes downright nasty. Most of us Floridians are now stuck with either high quality water filtration systems to get rid of the taste and smell, or we simply drink only bottled water.

2. Living Expenses are too high.

The minimum wage in Florida is currently about $7.75. It may be a few cents lower, but I haven’t looked it up lately. Assuming that you work in any of the most common occupations here, which are housekeeping, entry level medical positions, clerk at a store, preparing food, Disney, or landscaping, you won’t be making much more than this without a high level of training or a good degree. If you manage to find a job here, which is difficult at best and work 35 hours a week, which is average, you only total 1085.00 a month, BEFORE taxes. Taxes for a single person with no dependants runs about 15%, which would be $162.75 a month, leaving you a whopping $922.25. Now, the cheapest, crappiest apartments in Central Florida will charge around $500 a month. We’re down to 422.25 and we still haven’t paid the utility bills. In these cheap, crappy apartments, the insulation is usually shoddy, so expect an electric and water bill of around $80+ a month for one person, mostly due to heating and cooling costs. If you have cable and internet, expect another $80 or more. A cell phone bill is easily another $40. We’re down to 222.25 dollars now, and we haven’t bought food or gasoline or car insurance, which do vary widely from person to person, so I won’t include them here. As you can see, after you buy food and any other nessecities, you’re pretty close to broke.

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ryuko mahooka

Jul 18th, 2011

to true


Jul 18th, 2011

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ryuko mahooka

Jul 19th, 2011

Oh and you forgot to mention the fact that the cops in the central florida area will constintly pull you over off the road or for walking down the side walk just because your wearing the wrong type of clothing for a certin area or your car looks to nice or messed up for the same reason,oh and not to mention if you are out later then 9 or 10 pm you will get the same result from them!One more thing if you have tattoo’s or peircings youll be bothered by the local law enforcement as well!


Jul 19th, 2011

hmmm. Very true Ryuko. I was actually thinking that, too, but when I sat down to write the article, I had a brainfart.


Jul 19th, 2011

Agreed, It isn’t the best state for a young start. I love visiting periodically, but the chances of me living there willingly, again, are slim to none.


Jul 19th, 2011

“Top seven reasons…”

I could only see 2?


Jul 19th, 2011

Ah, you gotta go to the next page, Vicky.


Jul 24th, 2011

funny article very well written


Jul 24th, 2011

Thanks. lol

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